Section three
Fight the Machine
Advocacy, coordination, and knowing more than you're supposed to.
You can be irritated and frustrated with the system — but that does no good. You have to learn how to live in the system we have and own it. That includes knowing more than you ever wanted to know about insurance, advocacy, the legal side, and where your line in the sand is.
No one cares more than you. That's not a burden — it's your greatest advantage.
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A 20-minute audio summary of Fight Back — updated as new articles are added.
Articles
The Medical Divorce
The cleanest path I could find to keep my wife of 42 years insured was to divorce her. Then I ran into Clarence.
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PAY ATTENTION to What They're Putting In
The anti-psychotic prescribed in the ICU that nobody came back to reevaluate. How asking one casual question changed everything.
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The Pulmonary Rehab Takeover
The generic program was designed for the average patient. Lonna was not the average patient. And I was not a perfectly average caregiver.
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Brian, I'm Starting to Forget Things
A letter to my son — and a system to help when it's your turn. Build it before the fog rolls in.
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The 45-Minute Argument
How to fight for your person. The doctor who wanted to put her on a subcutaneous pump. Why I pushed back and why it mattered.
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Multi-Provider Care Coordination
The v0.1 document built during a crisis. How to keep multiple specialist teams aligned when the system is designed to keep them apart.
Coming soon
Rejected by Three Transplant Centers
What to do when the answer is no. How to keep pushing when every institution says stop.
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Decoding the Discharge Process
The little d, the big D, the big red C. What hospital discharge actually looks like from the inside.
Coming soon
The Coordination Gap
What happens when providers don't talk to each other. The amlodipine story. The limits of advocacy and the honest reckoning with what it can and cannot prevent.
Coming soon
The system is broken. Here's how to navigate it anyway.
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“I told him he was being lazy and not helpful. Trust has to be earned. I do not trust new doctors and they certainly don't trust me. Pick your battles — but push back. No one cares more than you.”— Casey King, The Caregiver's Trap